how it started

i've been wanting to write something about me and my bf but everytime i'm online and ready to pour out my emotions,i get disoriented.i can't even start a single sentence.i dunno how to start or what to say first.this has been sitting on my mailbox and i keep on editing the whole thing.whatever...

he's 24 and i'm 24.aquarius vs. taurus.i've known reggie since we were kids but we're not close.uhm...family friends.everyone knows everyone.our grandparents are neighbors.i was so lil then for me to remember how he was like when we were kids.i dunno if he was there when dad would tag me along to one of his saturday morning basketball games because our parents are basketball buddies.and i was always there with the other kids cheering for our dads. we're not classmates coz he went to school early.we were schoolmates in grade school but i only got to talk to him in high school.he was there eleven years ago during the isaiah play and the YFC too.just last month when i went home,we rummaged my old things and he found my diary.i immediately took it from him and found out that his name is always there in almost every page.haha...it's like we talked everyday.i remembered it so well during the first week of classes when we were under the shade of the talisay tree with titing(hs friend) and i was wearing a new dress and then they kept on teasing me and they started calling me "dalaga".he was always there during my runaway days.i remembered him inviting me on his bday but i didn't come.he's a basketball afficionado and was a member of my dad's bball team. i (with my sis)cheered for the basketball team just so we could join the team eating right after the game.haha.he stayed overnight and attended the wake of my granny.and was still there when dad passed away.i can still remember him bringing coffee and other stuffs.i remember the dimple,the megawatt smile and mr. chinito.the mr.nice guy in high school. he's someone i did't expect to like me.he's one of the farthest people in my mind that i could think of to like me.(who am i anyway?)he's someone who is always in the background.the tease.the bearer.the friend.the mailbox or should i say the postman?the messenger or whatever you call it.and then come fourth year,i only get to see him during basketball games and a simple "hi and bye" would do.then he left.the world is too small for us not to remember each other.after 4years,we started sending msgs through friendster.then the long emails followed,chat and it progressed to phone marathons.that started it.june 14,2006 was the day.

the stalking continues

 

part of my routine is to check my statcounter and there's something interesting about it.someone's checking my site,i thought she's/he's just one of the bloghoppers who chanced upon my site.her/his location is PALAU.wow i said to myself because it's a nice place as featured on TV.they have nice beaches there and it's one of my dream destinations.anyway,she's/he's consistently checking my site.hmmm...i can't remember if i have friends who lives there.plus she/he checks it from my friendster blog.how come?hmmm again...but i didn't care finding out who she/he is.i really didn't have any idea who that person is until this afternoon.i went online during my lunch to check my mails and friendster too.hehe...lo and behold!just when i viewed those who updated their profiles and added photos,something caught my attention.it's the word PALAU...hmmm..now i know who she is.i can't believe it that everything has been laid out infront of my very own eyes.thank God she found her way here.i'm not guilty.i will not take it back whatever i've said in the past....

 

**wink*wink**

too much has been said

while Lebanon is being bombed 24/7,there's also a word war going on here.thank you to those who defended me and who left comments.thanx to reggie,brat,jane,aden,cath,pintas,anonymous/one of my fans,my friends,and to those who've read my post and chose not to comment.

i'm good when you're good but i can be ur worst nightmare if u want me to.i can only think of two things why A.D. did this to me.that would be jealousy and envy. i've known her since grade school not because she's a head-turner,not because she tops her class,not because she is sosyal,not because she belongs to the alta sociedad but because we live in the same place and go to the same school where everyone knows everyone.it's just a "hi and bye" if i see her.i know she had petty quarrels in high school but who am i to judge her.i heard she's maldita but i didn't care because she was never mean to me.i know she would always be there for her friends and would really fight for them like how friends would do.she is the Ex's bestfriend as i said and i know she felt bad for her.she no longer leaves comments here but i know that she's been checking my site.

an open letter:

am,
u can never dictate someone what to do especially if it involves feelings.u cannot ask him to love her because his heart belongs to someone else.he's 24 and he's in his right state of mind to make decisions.and i very well know reggie would not settle for the second best.men would always go for the best.i just don't know if ur fighting for ur friend this time.or maybe ur also fighting for yourself.i tell you to move over because u don't have a chance here.i don't need reggie for me to have a greener pasture.i'm sooo not using him for me to go to the US of A.maybe that's the reason why ur running after him.why did u have to go to canada?i can stay in the philippines,be happy and enjoy the greener pasture.i don't have to look somewhere else for a greener pasture.i can eat more than 3times a day and anytime i feel hungry.i can watch movie anytime without waiting for someone to pay for my ticket.i can go on a quick vacation,pay my bills,go online anytime and i don't need to ask load from anyone,shop, and have fun.i have my family,my friends,my relatives and i have reggie too.that for me is the greenest pasture.i don't need to be a millionaire to be happy.i'd rather be happy and poor.but in reality,i'm afraid to be poor.but i'm more afraid to be sad.who would even want to be poor?is that hard to understand?i just wanted to have a comfortable life.i just wanted a simple life.i'm not sosyalera.why should i?i won't sweat it out to be one.i don't know how u define sosyalera.if u'll just use two of your brain cells,u would understand what i'm trying to tell you.i never really brag about my life but you are going way overboard.i would not humble myself and say sorry to you for all the things that has been said here.why should i?u deserve it.losers would always be losers.being in canada will not make u a god.if i were in ur place(which i wouldn't wish to be in),i would make it up by being a good person.too bad,u weren't there when God gifted us with manners,beauty and brains.double time working young lady,let me tell you that no matter how u work ur ass off in canada,u cannot buy beauty and good manners.it's something that should come from within.being beautiful is not really being pretty.if u have a good heart,you'll learn that happiness does not depend on greener pastures.you cannot take my tiara away from me.get a life!

***i dunno what's next after this.i just wanna put an end to what she started.too much has been said.

puh-leeeaaassse...

tsk...tsk...

*where do u wanna go now?

beach.bring my pink beach bag with my slippers,a fashion magazine, two-piece,cover-ups,shades,digicam,sunblock and other travel essentials.i wanna spread my sarong on the beachfront and enjoy the beautiful view.i needed to unwind.i just wanna feel the sand on my feet and enjoy the sun and the water.i've been checking the web for nice beaches.

spa.and a nice massage will do.

camp.i think it will be fun.and it has to be near a lake.

roadtrip.i wanna go to davao coz i've never been there.

*ultimate summer destination?

amanpulo resort.'nuff said.

*weekdays are spent for?

talk to reggie for hours through skype.going online is one of the things that makes me sane.hear mass on sunday.watch movie after mass.eat lechon.laundry.go to sto.niño on monday.another movie.dinner with friends.grocery.go to the mall.team outing.or a quick trip to dalaguet.my RD is on sun-mon.

*watch TV?

yes and no.the last time i watched tv was last monday.i had nothing to do that time because i promised reggie i'd wake him up at 1am.i enjoyed watching "america's top model" on studio 23 and i kept on saying "wow!there are a lot of new commercials" when in fact it's old.that is because i don't watch tv anymore.i know i've missed so many shows.i even got surprised about how bad the war in lebanon went.i never expected it's that serious.when i heard mass last month,there was this prayer for peace thingie and that's when i found out...haha... don't even say it.i know.thank God...i could still get updates online.i'm in-the-know now.


*what's the sexiest thing you've worn?

two-piece.

*do u love salt?

hmmm...why not sugar?hehe...yeah...salt for almost all types of fruits even ripe ones.

*what's one of the things that u had to let go?

the mosquito net.anyone close to me can attest to this.i can't sleep without it.it's more of a comfort zone.but sometimes we need to leave our comfort zones.i've had many tries before i finally got over it.i once placed it in a big plastic bag and put it on top of the cabinets.but i ended up waking up in the middle of the night,climb up and sleep with it on my feet.when i went to school in CDO,i had to cut a portion of it because it would be too bulky if i bring the whole thing. lil by lil,i easily got over it.i'm mosquito net-free now.hehe...

*movie u wanna watch this weekend:

correction,movies.click,just my luck and my super EX-girlfriend.

i'm tagging everyone...

go to this site :

http://www.freestuffhotdeals.com/hacker/1.html

this game is fun...it brings out "the robert langdon" in you.

have fun!!!i find it hard but it feels great after taking it.whew!

you'll get this msg once ur done:

CONGRATULATIONS!

GREAT JOB!!

doncha wish...

gotcha...

right after i published my post yesterday,i searched the web to check who anonymous is.
the mysterious person intrigued me with her comments:

special thanks to my friend cath for giving me a clue.*clap*clap*i have a statcounter on my blog that can trace the IP address.and anonymous accessed my blog from my friendster blog.she accessed my blog the same time the comment was posted on my site...it's exciting to find out who the culprit is.i dont want anyone to mess up with me.she may think i'm a neophyte in the cyberspace but definitely NOT.i kick ass in cyberspace.hehe...

screenshot from my statcounter:



screenshot from friendster:

i am 99% percent it's the same person.i know her since grade school.she happens to be my bf's classmate and the EX's best friend.'nuff said...

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

to whom it may concern

I recently got a comment on my prev post from anonymous.i tried to ignore it but people are asking me.my friend cath sent me a msg asking me who anonymous is.and she stated that it's kinda scary.my sister also said the same thing.i really don't know who he/she is.i have a strong feeling that he/she knows me so well.i got the comment right after i went home in time for our fiesta and the whole town knew that i was with my bf.a lot of people got surprised even my friends and his circle of friends too.  there was no objection from my family and his family.so,maybe anonymous saw us there and checked my friendster acct because we recently uploaded pictures there.and since i have a link to my blog,maybe he/she found his/her way here.he maybe one of those guys who was on my busted list.doncha wish ur gf was hot like me?hahaha...or could be his EX.with all confidence,i would say that i will never ever be insecure with her as my rival.plus he is now mine.so,move over.or maybe a jealous friend of his ex who thinks i don't deserve him. well,i've met the whole clan not that i requested him to do that but they all wanted to meet me and he's proud of me.bleeh... i really don't have anything againts u guys.i'm just kinda intrigued because it looks like ur threatening me.it's too obvious that u just found ur way here because if u are a constant reader here,u wouldn't be browsing through my old posts anymore.hmmm....i share the same thoughts with some people who happened to read my blog.so,maybe i'm right.

 

owh...just remember that this is the world wide web and everything can be traced.so,i'll gotcha one of these days.i'll be kicking ass sooner than u expected.